Christmas Caroling at the Nursing Home

My godfather and his wife planned a fun Christmas party which was to include some Christmas caroling at a local nursing home.  The caroling was one of the most wonderful memories we'll make this year, I am certain.

The girls loved it.  Kayla happily handed out the cards we made to the residents, spouting "Merry Christmas!" with a joyous grin on her face.  Elise and Ava followed after, smiling and shouting out merry Christmases of their own.

And then we got to the actual caroling...the girls danced around with maracas and made everyone laugh.  I always love singing Christmas carols, but this was better than any carol-singing experience I've ever had in the past.  With Chris playing the guitar and our girls dancing and smiling, it was perfect.  I love that quote from the movie, Elf, "The best way to spread Christmas cheer is to sing loud for all to hear".  We did a lot of that last night and I hope that in some small way our group was able to spread the love of Christ this Christmas season.

Christmas traditions

Let's start with some of my favorite childhood memories of Christmas time (in no particular order, but numbered because I am a list sort of person)

1. Our felt advent calendar that my mom made. When we were younger, I would try to arrange it so that it was my turn to open the pocket on the 3rd of December because that was Mary. The only female character in our advent calendar, and I really liked that my mom made her out of pink felt instead of the norm: blue. We would all "fight" over who got to open the pocket on the 24th too. Can you guess who was in that pocket?

2. My mom's friend, MaryAnn, who was like a second mom to us had her birthday on the 23rd of December. We would often combine her birthday with a big Christmas party where my best friend, Maria's, dad would play Christmas carols on the piano and we'd all sing along. He played the accordian too so sometimes we took the show on the road and went caroling as well.

3. When we were kids, my parents attended the Christmas Eve "children's" Mass and each year a little girl was chosen to carry up the baby Jesus statue to be placed in the full-sized Nativity scene at the front of the church. The year I was asked to carry the baby Jesus, I received a red velvet Christmas dress. As a child, those two things in combination were my vision of Heaven. I was thrilled.

4. I remember listening to my parents'records (Kimmy, if you are reading this, I call them records too. I'm not hip either...). The ones that really stick out in my mind are John Denver's Christmas record and Bing Crosby's White Christmas. My mom always hated the song "Please Daddy, Don't get Drunk this Christmas" on the Denver album, but it had a catchy tune... I loved that Bing Crosby record so much that when I was in college (and my parents' record player had broken several years back), I searched high and low and found it in CD form so I could hear the glorious songs and relive my childhood with B-b-b-bing.

5. We used to have a secret Kris Kringle tradition where we all picked the name of another family member at the beginning of Advent and then throughout the season we would do nice things or leave secret presents for that person. I remember doing such things as making my brother's bed, or leaving little gifts of a candy bar or chewing gum on my sister's pillow.

6. Putting up the tree was another favorite, though we always managed to get into some sort of argument by the end of the festivities. Regardless, the memories remain of picking our favorite ornament to hang on the tree first and my dad untangling and passing the ornaments out as we all made the rounds from him to the tree and back again. Arguments or no, we always finished off with a delicious mug of eggnog.

7. My mom always made an assortment of Christmas goodies each year which included: coconut kisses, peanut butter balls, sugar cookies, fudge, and scotcharoos. Christy was generally in charge of the coconut kisses (she liked them a lot and was the oldest girl). Sean (the patient and responsible oldest child) usually did the fudge. My mom usually mixed up the rest and the rest of us rolled, cut, frosted, and decorated. Some of my brothers were quite the cookie decorators. Scott and Kevin's designs were a sight to behold and consequently theirs were often the cookies chosen to be sent out to our family and friends near and far.

8. The stockings have always been one of my favorite holiday traditions. But for me the reason was because I loved my stocking. There are 7 of us kids, and the first 5 of us all have handmade and stitched stockings that one of my mom's friends made. Robbie and Shannon were the unlucky ones in this story though my mom did manage to find stockings for them that fit in with the ones of the first 5 kids. Anyway, my stocking had my name handstitched and had a few snowmen on it. I loved it. Over the years, there were some stocking mishaps. Christy and Sean's felt backings started tearing at the top, Scott's backing tore just about everywhere, and Kevin's stocking survived (though, not unscathed) a fire from being put too close to the--fire. (duh). Mine was pampered and loved and to this day is in mint condition (unless my parents have ruined it since I moved out of the house, that is)

9. Every Christmas morning, my sister (we shared a room from as far back as I can remember until she was a senior in high school) would wake me up at the crack of dawn. The reason she woke me up was because she was really excited, but parents always seem to be more lenient when it's the small ones who tiptoe into their room wondering if it's time to look at stockings and see what Santa brought. But before she sent me into their room, she and I would always tiptoe out to the living room and gaze in awe at the beautiful tree all lit up with presents spilling out from underneath and the stockings all resting against the fireplace stuffed and topped with a big, bright orange.

10. For several years, my siblings and I put on a play depicting the Christmas story. My mom directed it and made/gathered costumes from somewhere. We performed it for family and friends who visited during the holidays. Once again, I was elated because I got to be Mary (she had no speaking lines and got to carry a baby doll, who was, of course, baby Jesus). Kevin was Joseph. Scott and Christy played several parts. I believe they were both wisemen and shepherds. Sean was the innkeeper (narrator) and my memory is still puzzling over whether he or Kevin played the part of the third wiseman. Robbie was the sheep.

I have many wonderful Christmas memories, but those are just a few of my favorites. Chris and I are busy trying to make memories with our own children and forming traditions. Some are things that each of us did when we were little, and some are things we came up with ourselves. Some are not really traditions yet because we have only actually done them once. Like getting a Christmas tree (see the last post).

Both Chris and my family send out Christmas cards/letters. Chris and I have carried on that tradition, but I have taken to finding something other than the traditional form letter to tell of our family's adventures. It sounded like a great idea, but each year it gets harder and harder to come up with a creative new idea (and we've only done 3 so far...). This year the number of physical cards and letters sent out was somewhat limited as we decided to use the blog to wish most of our friends a merry Christmas (stay tuned for the letter which should be up by tomorrow or Tuesday).

Both our families always make Christmas goodies of sorts. Chris' family changes types each year while my mom usually stuck with the same (as listed above) until very recently she has swapped out a few. I do a little of both. I usually try a few new recipes and stick with a few solid ones that we enjoy. Peppermint bark and truffles are becoming some of my usuals. This year Kayla and I also made gingerbread cookies, peanut butter balls, cracker candy, and various chex mixes. Tonight I tried an original truffle: chocolate root beer. Sounds a little strange, but is actually quite tasty as the root beer is very subtle and the chocolate is very chocolaty. Mmmm.

We left the Christmas lights on all night (Chris' family's tradition). We drank eggnog after decorating our tree (my family's tradition). This year, we left a little "note from Santa" on Kayla's whiteboard (our own tradition). She was thrilled when we said that Santa left her a note and ran out the front door looking for him. We watch Christmas movies, do Christmas crafts, and read Christmas stories. Many families read the Christmas story from the Bible on Christmas morning (both our families did), but we chose to read a children's version with pictures instead. We have made a little tradition of going to my grandmother's for Christmas Eve. The girls get oranges in their stockings. And we dress them up in fancy dresses for Christmas (Eve) Mass.

the "chokehold" hug

Elise wasn't into the pictures; she wanted food

Kayla was a cheeseball, as usual; a very cute one

Lily had a dress in the same brand, but a different style. Such cute cousins!

We are loving coming up with new traditions and taking beloved ones from our pasts. Can't wait to make more memories and more traditions! Merry Christmas!

Christmas 2021

 

I was on a roll getting caught up on blog posts, and then I got to last year's (2021) Christmas post. 

 OOF. 

Pain. Heartache. 

I didn't know how to write this blog post and not have it simply be bitter and sad. 

So I waited. 

And now it's nearly Christmas 2022.  

My heart is still heavy.  Christmas is the most difficult time of year in the situation I find myself in.  It's a time for family and love and joy and peace.  And I find myself alone half the time and alone on Christmas Eve and parts of the day on Christmas.  And that isn't how it's supposed to be.  

I am grateful that last year I was able to go to Christmas Eve Mass with my kids and enjoy dinner with close family friends before I had to drop them off  at Chris' for the night.  I am grateful the kids came over to the house the next day for a couple hours to open presents and hang out.  I truly am SO very grateful for every precious moment.  

But it doesn't cancel out the injustice of the other side of the situation.  

The part where my kids aren't there.  

The part where our hearts are hurting and broken because we want to be together the whole day, laughing and celebrating for all of it because we love each other. 

The brokenness.  The loneliness. 

I'm not going to pretend everything is "fine" to make others feel better about divorce. 

I'm not going to pretend that simply "staying together" solves all pain either. 

The only thing that solves the problem is the healing power of  Love. 

TRUE, humble, poor and lowly, powerful and miraculous Love. 

Love has a name. 

Emmanuel.  

God WITH us. 

If you are never willing to engage in YOUR story and why you react the way you do, what things and people hurt you in your past (generally your family of origin or people you engaged with when you were quite young), name the harm that was done to you, name the shame that you underwent, and be honest about how it has all affected you, you will not be able to give it to the Savior and let Him work at healing your woundedness. 

Many of us are stuck blaming our spouses, our kids, our co-workers, our friends...

usually the deep wound happened much further back. 

All those interactions with spouses, kids, and friends now is simply triggers from past pain. 

And when we don't deal with them, we wound and harm and hurt the people WE love most: OUR spouses, OUR children, OUR friends and neighbors. 

Break the cycle.  

Engage YOUR story.  Engage YOUR pain honestly.  

Apologize for the ways you have harmed others in your pain.  

Break the cycle. 

Go to the manger. 

Look at the Prince of Peace. 

Look at Love. 

I wrote this paragraph after Christmas and it was all I could write about it for a long while.  

It's beautiful and relevant. 

"Christmas 2021 was bittersweet.

The rip in our family unit was raw and painful.

But there was joy amidst the heart ache.

Friends and family blessed us in countless ways.

And if there’s one thing I want to highlight in all this mess,

it’s the LOVE of Christ shown through others.

Jesus is real.

I have seen Him.

I have seen Him in the Eucharist, where I have run time and again when it all seems to be too much. He holds me there.

I have seen Him in the love of neighbor.

I have to share just a few ways because it’s beautiful to see the hands and feet of Christ at work.

Little gifts arrived to make me smile.

An ornament with my word of year (JOY) on it to remind in 2022 to look for it.

A box of handmade soap and honey, so sweet and thoughtful.

Cards with a little cash to be sure the kids and I had a beautiful Christmas.

Invitations to Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and Boxing Day dinner so I wouldn’t be alone.

A gift of a spa day for a friend and I, which also a huge lesson in receiving because I have never spoiled myself so much. In fact on the way to the spa I told the Lord it was too much and I should spend it on something more practical that I need. His reply? “You are worth more than any spa day cost. You are worth it.” And so I had my day of pure relaxation and rest and it was truly glorious.

Friends gave the most thoughtful gifts and we spent wonderful quality time caroling, having Christmas parties and movie/game nights with dear friends.

And just after Christmas my brother’s family traveled from CA to spend a week with us.

We played games, we laughed, we cried, we prayed night prayer, we sang, we had dodgeball fights, and went sledding.

I could not believe how many ways God showed up through our community of family and friends.

So, to those who don’t believe He is working miracles and can work still greater ones, here is the proof that you are wrong.

God is always up to something.

Thank you to all our family and friends who followed the voice of the Spirit to pour out HIS love to us this Christmas season."

Christmas Eve dinner and games with friends

                                                        Video of Saran wrap game

Christmas morning Mass with my former neighbor

opening presents with the kiddos

Kolbe rollerskating

Kolbe rollerskating 2

The kids made up a Nativity play for me as a Christmas gift.  

The BEST Christmas gift. 

Click on the videos- you won't regret. it.  :)

Nativity story 1

Nativity story 2

Nativity story 3

Joseph and Mary and baby Jesus.

the angel 

I was invited by myself for Christmas dinner with these same wonderful friends. 

beautiful, thoughtful gifts from my kiddos

my new seal stuffie from the kiddos

Dear friends invited me to spend the day after Christmas with them. 

More games!

So much love and beauty.  I cannot look at these pictures without crying with joy. Amidst all the pain, there truly was still joy because of the LOVE of incredible people that God has placed in my life. 

Sisters video 

And that's a wrap.  Lots of emotions in a post like this.  Time to go recover. 

December 2019 re-cap

 December 2019. 

A beautiful time before the CRAZINESS of 2020 hit us.  

Getting out Christmas decorations!  They had so much fun helping.  They set out the knick knacks and our HUGE collection of Christmas BOOKS!!!

Chris found a lovely tree, nice and big and full, to grace our front window.  

 

Oh, those branches.  Just looking at them up close again, the wonderful pine smell is seeping over me.  

And honestly, even in August, that smell just makes my soul happy.  I have a Christmas spirit essential oil that I totally put on every few months just because that Christmas feel is so uplifting.  

Lights on the tree!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Decorating.  It just tickled me how confused Kolbe looked standing here next to Daddy.  

Oldest and youngest decorating together

Look at Sophie go. Grabbed a chair and put some ornaments higher up!

Chris' parents bought me this ornament when we were dating.  It's a little Irish girl.  

Chris and I met in the Dublin airport on our way over to Austria for a semester abroad.  *heart eyes emoji*  

The tree is such a beautiful, beautiful way to recall so many beautiful memories and experiences.  

You guys, I was so excited to start the Advent journal from Blessed is She.  And it was really good.  I had a lovely Advent, reflecting on the beauty and struggle of family and really bringing it all to the Lord and working through it all with Him.  My heart grew and expanded, just like it always does when I spend time with Jesus, listening more intently and yet, sharing my whole heart with Him, exactly where it IS, not just where I WANT it to be.  

The girls' sweet dance studio organized a Christmas showcase that was just the cutest.  I love seeing my little girlies dancing and smiling and learning new things!

A favorite book around here at Christmas time is How the Grinch Stole Christmas.  The kids love the Grinch song from the old cartoon and they love it when Chris sings it to them especially.  Consequently, they also run to him with the book begging him to read it and do his fun Grinchy voices.  It's just the sweetest thing to watch and I love getting to sit on the sideline and just bask in the cuteness.  

We got to meet some of the reindeer at a local ranch and home supply shop.  The kids were pretty fascinated. 

A couple of the girls went caroling with a group of kids from church led by our choir director.  They really enjoyed singing for others and spreading Christmas cheer.  

We have the best realtor.  We've been in the house several years, and he sends us Christmas goodies every year.  This year they were yummy cookies!!

Chris made the BEST and most moist and delicious brisket for Christmas Eve this year.  I asked for brisket for Mother's Day this year because his Christmas Eve brisket was mouth-wateringly good.  

Yep, my mouth is totally watering just looking at these pictures.  Time to smoke another brisket, babe!!