Celebration of Life party

In my last post, I siggested ways to help a pregnant mama out.  Among these was the idea to host a Celebration of Life party.

Everyone wants to throw a shower when you are pregnant with your first child.  They gather together to celebrate with excitement the coming birth of this precious life and shower you with gifts.  I understand that there isn't the same need for gifts for babies after the first, but there is still need, and more than gifts, there is often a need to be surrounded by JOY and well-wishes.  It is not easy to inhabit a world that tends to regard the very idea of having more than 2 or 3 children as somewhat crazy.   It is not easy to have people meet you in public places and comment about the apparent need in your life for a hobby or the incredulous looks you receive when you venture to the grocery store with kids in tow, followed by the remark, "Are they ALL yours?"  

It's also somewhat depressing to fill out your third (insert any number after 1) child's baby book and come to the section about a baby shower and leave it completely blank.  I find that often the hospital visitors and visitors to the house after baby is born, or congratulatory cards are also rarely received after the first child.  And yes, gifts, too, are bestowed less and less.  In short, there is very little celebration for children after baby #1, perhaps 2....

So I have vowed that even if I have to throw a party myself, there will be a celebration for each of our babies.  Not a party seeking gifts (though I WILL outline some needs that families have and I'm sure no mama would say no to receiving some useful items), but one to invite friends and family to rejoice in the gift of life with us!  One of the things I have  needed most during my pregnancies is to be surrounded by people who care about me.  This is a wonderful way to do just that for someone you love who is pregnant.

And it is the easiest kind of party to throw.  There's no need for a theme or fancy decorations (unless that is something you love to do-in which case, do it!).  There's no need for games and prizes.  It can be a party with just your girlfriends or it can be a party that includes entire families.  That is my preference, since after, all, it's about celebrating life.  Here are a few possibilities to get you started:

• A backyard BBQ
• A potluck at the park
• Drinks and appetizers (be sure there's some fun alcohol-free options for mom)

And in case you wanted to know some truly useful gift ideas for a family who has several children, here are some of those too:

1. Gift cards or cash ( to go towards items like a double stroller, or additional car seats for older kids, or bedding/furniture needs etc)

2. Diapers and wipes (in many sizes)

3. Clothing items

•     if babies are born in different seasons there may be a need for clothes to fill in those gaps 
•     purchase clothes for the oldest child which will be helpful in the present and in the future perhaps as  hand-me-downs
•    maternity clothes (your body isn't the same in each pregnancy so items fit differently and there may be a need for some updates to mom's closet)

 4. Books- Consider buying some classics (I love the Little House series, Narnia etc. ), Saint picture or chapter books, and other books to aid children in learning their faith.

5. Random stuff- things like...

  - this stroller storage product

 - a new diaper bag (ask mom, these can get so worn out or just have been a poorly designed diaper bag in  the first place.  I never even consider a diaper bag now that doesn't have a shoulder strap option, so that I can be hands-free and not have a large bag falling off my shoulder while I'm trying to simultaneously hold a baby and grab another few by the hand) Here's one that looks good to me (keep it in mind for our next baby)

  -  a newborn photography session

  - if you are crafty make something.  Here's a neat idea.  I know I'd love one.   It's a wipe-able, washable changing pad with a pocket for diapers and wipes

check it out here

- Diaper clutch- for when you don't want to take the entire diaper bag with you for a diaper change.  Sweet!

Fine it on Pinterest here

 -  gift card for Snapfish or Shutterfly or another photo printing service Mom uses, so she can print some pictures for baby books, scrapbooks, photo albums, relatives

 - or this, mustache pacifier, because it's awesome.  

                                                             Found on Pinterest here

  - ASK the mother-to-be what she needs.  She will be able to tell you what they didn't get with other kids, but would like to have, or what is worn out and needs replacing, or what just strikes her fancy that day....

Gifts or no gifts, have a party to celebrate the life of another beautiful and precious life.  

Pro-life Encouragement- A Rant

I realize that by writing this, I am begging for people to ask me if we are expecting, but this is just something that's been on my heart to write about for awhile.   I just haven't made the time to do it until now, but with a recent pregnancy announcement from one of my sisters-in-law, I thought I'd finally put out a few thoughts about what you can do for the pregnant people in your life, ESPECIALLY the ones who are on #2, 3, 6, or 20.  It's not that I have anything against people having their first baby, and many of the suggestions I make can and will apply to them too, but the world is excited for everyone's FIRST baby, and then the excitement for a new life just seems to dwindle as a woman has subsequent children.

What's my point?

 If you say you stand for life, and you don't make just as much (if not more effort) for a woman who is pregnant with babies after her first, you are a hypocrite.

Too harsh for you?  Tough.

We have 3 kids, all girls.  After we had our first, I felt like the only cause for possible excitement with most people was that we must be "trying for our boy".  THAT would make it exciting, but otherwise, people were either just sort-of silent or they were vocal about how "my hands are going to be full" or "boy, it's going to be tough when all those girls are teens".

I'm sorry.  Can we live in the present?

Yes, it would be exciting if we had a boy.  It would also be exciting if we had another girl.  This isn't a shopping trip to the Mall for my new favorite outfit.  I'm being given a great gift.  Perhaps our culture of gift cards and gift receipts makes us forget that it's actually quite rude to complain about a gift you've been given.  It may not be exactly what you were dreaming of or hoping for (and that's actually o.k).  The point is to realize that God gave you this child, this gift, for a reason, and he/she is meaningful to Him regardless of their health or gender.  He knows you better than you know yourself, so His gift to you will indeed be what is best for you, even if it's not what you had been "hoping" for.

If we get pregnant again, I do think part of me would hope it's a boy.    Not because I would not be perfectly content with another girl, but because we don't have one, so it would be a joy to be blessed with that experience as a mom and dad as well.  That being said, I still hate the question, "Are you hoping for boy?" because if you answer yes, you are made to feel as though you are admitting that you would not be happy with the alternate possibility.

Instead of all the cliches, let's try to change this mentality surrounding pregnancy and create a society that embraces life. We have to be the ones who start it.  Read the blog tomorrow for a follow-up post with helpful tips since this post was more of a rant, but let's at least start with an easy idea that we should all be able to handle.

Encouragement.

Let's take the time and energy to give a word of encouragement to the pregnant mommas we see, whether it's your sister, your friend, an acquaintance, or a total stranger.

Yeah, Mom!  You're doing awesome!

And stay tuned for tomorrow's post with practical tips to "help a pregnant mama out!"

Walk for Life--San Francisco 2013

I have marched several times in Washington DC when I was attending The Franciscan University of Steubenville and living just outside DC after graduating. We have been in CA for 4 Roe vs. Wade anniversaries now. Chris has worked every single one with Immaculate Heart Radio, and I never wanted to take on the crowds and craziness with young children all by myself.

This year, my sister-in-law who lives between us and San Francisco, was available and we figured out a workable way to attend. After looking into many different options, we decided trying to hop on one of the many parish buses would be our best bet. She found a bus that still had spaces near her place, and we signed up last minute.

The bus ride was fun, and the girls were as thrilled as if we were riding a roller coaster. In fact, when we arrived back at the parish parking lot after the event, Kayla had a small meltdown because she wanted to keep riding the bus.

Our bus arrived in San Francisco fairly early, so we had some time to kill before the Rally and Walk started. First stop: Find Chris and say hello. We easily found him under the large CATHOLIC RADIO banner, and took a few pictures to commemorate the event and the fact that we were all there. Perhaps next year we'll be able to actually attend the event as a family and walk together too.

I made Laura D. get in another quick picture with Kayla and Elise too

The event started near a plaza that had two sets of playground equipment, so we made a stop there for awhile with the girls. They loved it. Next, Laura D., the girls, and myself met up with my mom and little sis, Shannon who arrived on a bus from my hometown several hours away. We ate our lunch with them on the plaza and took lots of pictures.

We listened to some speakers and the Walk began shortly after. There were reportedly 50,000+ people there (you can read the recap here on Walk for Life's website. It will likely be completely ignored by the mainstream media, but we were there, by the thousand, and we walked for LIFE. They started the rally with the singing of the National Anthem. I cried the whole way through, saddened by our country's choices as a nation. But the event made me proud that even though our voices are continually stifled by the media and government, we were there and there was no denying in the flesh that there are many who still stand for LIFE and we're never giving up. Ever.

(just a few of the 50,000+ people who were there with us)

(leaving the event afterwards)

Just some shots of the city--it was a beautiful day.

Thanks for all your help with the girls, Nana, Aunt Shannon, and Auntie Laura "Tambourine"!!! You guys were the best!

Pro-life

"A person's a person, no matter how small" -Dr. Seuss

"How can there be too many babies? That's like saying there are too many flowers?" -Mother Teresa