Chris took the kiddos on a hike and these were some cute pictures that were taken
Amazing friends loving on me
My sweet girlie!
One of Kayla's buddies had a pool party
Hanging with friends at their pool
And....the difficult part of the post if you scrolled through this far.
Last July 22 I received the divorce papers that Chris had signed and were ready for me to sign.
I couldn't. For several reasons, I stalled.
But you have to sign if you want your kids, so eventually my hand was forced.
July 25 the civil divorce finalized.
Another piece of my already shredded heart broken.
I don't honestly remember a lot of that day except that I felt so alone.
It's been many months since then and I can honestly say that the feelings are muted more, but I feel mostly the same- alone. Working full time, seeing my kids 50% of the time (although legally it's that way, I get a bit more contact because I work at the kids' school so they come visit me and hug me every school day), the weight of the finances and the home and the kids all on me is too much.
If you are a mom, you may be able to imagine a bit of the grief that goes along with having your children taken from you. The pain is deep, friends, and crushing at times. I pray so hard that others do not make this choice and choose their wives, choose their family -together and united with Christ- because what I live and experience each and every day since the split is devastating and desolate.
I saw these thistles last July and prayed that somewhere in all the sharp pain and the weeds that are choking our family and strangling my kids' hearts and my heart, that there would be beauty. I prayed that we would somehow be open enough to the movement of the Holy Spirit to find the joy and beauty in places where it feels like there will never be any.
I'm now at the end of my first year back teaching full time (I haven't taught in the classroom since I was pregnant with Kayla) and I am exhausted. But the hand of God has been with me and I have crawled along one day at a time. There have been many thorns, but there has been beauty too.
The parade in our town was canceled because of Covid, but the neighborhood kids put on their own parade and it was a delight.
Chris and Nicholas put on a little teaser firework display during the day to test a few for later
There was frisbee throwing with neighbors in the street, a small potluck up in the cul de sac and we attended a friend's little 4th of July gathering in the afternoon/evening.
And then we got home at dark to put on our own neighborhood firework show.
Chris and Nick bought some of the big ones and put on a fabulous show for our neighbors which was enjoyed by all.
This one is my favorite
It got a little loud for Kolbe so he came to snuggle with me and fell asleep.
Awww, sweet sweet memories.
And there were sparklers for everyone at the end (and warnings about using them carefully)
The next day Kolbe woke up asking if we could light off more fireworks.
It's funny to finally be writing about the end of last school year because the beginning of the next begins in just over a week.
To celebrate the beginning of summer, Kayla and a few neighbor friends made cupcakes and organized a party.
Everyone brought something to share and the kids made decorations.
We discovered a new park near us that is tons of fun.
and the mountain views were lovely too.
We purchased the 50 Ways to Live Easter book from Blessed is She this year and it is really lovely. Each day is a short reflection that helps you draw deeper into the resurrection throughout the entire season of Easter instead of just celebrating the day and putting the idea of the resurrection back up on the shelf for next Easter. Because Easter was so late this year, Easter season was filled with beautiful sunny weather and lots of flowers!
ugh some creature she found near the pond. Immediately after we went and washed her hands. 10 times. lol. But I love her curiosity and adventurous spirit.
Mailman appreciation day. There's probably an official one, but we just made up our own because we felt like it and our mailman ROCKS!
Tree climbing and columbine spotting.
First pool day and this was the only photo I got because then we went to the pool and I had to keep track of my 5 kids. But we had fun. We met our neighbors there and had lots of fun splashing and doggie paddling.
Climbing our neighbors amazing tree.
Chris removed rocks from the front and added a little bed of flowers.
The local 'Kid's Fest'. There was a fire truck there that you could climb up into and firemen answering all your burning questions (pun intended), but when I went to take a picture of the kids in the truck half of them did not want to participate.
This lovely lady has been a huge blessing in my life this year. Brittany is our neighbor, but we didn't meet until a year after we moved in because they had moved to Florida for a year for her husband's job. I'm sorry to have missed that extra year hanging out, but I'm so glad that we are friends now. What a blessing their family has been. They have 3 girls so our girls LOVE that they live here too!
Their youngest turned 4 and we were invited to the cutest little unicorm party ever.
Elise and Ava were able to attend a dance camp this summer. They learned a variety of dances and the studio also taught them Bible lessons and stories too and intertwined faith and dance beautifully. There was a little recital at the end of the week.
You guys.
These little people always invade my bed. Off and on during the night, if they wake up, they try to sneak in for snuggles. In the morning, they jump right into bed with me. I get to wake up to the sweetest hugs and kisses (and elbows to the face).
They say my morning prayers with me (or sing songs or make interesting noises while I say them myself) and my favorite is when they sometimes look up at the cross on the wall and tell Jesus good morning. It melts my heart every single time and I bet it melts His too.
Kolbe started climbing out of the crib about 2 1/2 months shy of 3 years old, so we moved him into the room with the big boy bed. He picked out the fabric for that truck blanket so he could have a fleece like his sisters have and he is happy as a clam. It took awhile to get him to stay in bed on the regular at night, but it happened. Naps are way harder and he hasn't been napping regularly which is not so nice for Mama. We are still working on that skill since he's a stubborn one.
Some days the nap happens--but on me.
He is just the sweetest little snuggle bug and I have to document all the sweetest of these moments that I can because they just grow up so fast.
I told you guys .
These morning visits in bed and the snuggles are just the best.
I am so blessed to be mama to these 5 precious sweethearts.
Kolbe loves music and he loves singing. 90% of the time in the car, I play K-LOVE radio and he knows SO MANY songs. Sorry for the bad video, I was driving so I just held it up and hoped for the best since I wasn't looking at it.
A friend gave us a bag of stuff they were going to give to Goodwill to see if the kids could use anything and Sophie pulled this out and her reaction was priceless.
(I found out later it's actually a lining for a vest that sits around the neck part, but I rather thought the same as Sophie when I pulled it out).
Made a stop at adoration to visit Jesus and another at the park just outside.
All my little climbers.
Library summer reading program.
Sophie (4.5year) made this from scratch and I was just so impressed! Had to snap a picture.
I bought a few containers of play-doh and the kids had a lot of fun creating all kinds of interesting things throughout the summer.
These are a bunch of tiaras in case you couldn't tell. Kolbe's looks more like a yamaka.
Our neighbor took Kayla and her daughter and another neighbor pal on a bike ride to a nearby ice cream shop. They kinda loved it.
A bird built it's nest in the tree in our front yard.
Kayla was invited to go to a park with our neighbor while her brother played football and then went to a nerf gun place afterwards.
Making ice cream in a bag was super duper fun.
The kids may be obsessed with The Greatest Showman music.
Kolbe singing the songs from it is seriously the sweetest thing you'll see today.
"I think of what the world could be. A 'bigion' of the one I see"....
Those dance moves though.
Chick-Fil-A date with my monkeys.
Found a brand new ladder ball set at Goodwill.
I even assembled it.
The first attempts at playing.
Our neighbors got summer haircuts, so what did my girls want?
You guessed it.
Summer haircuts too.
Kayla was the only one who opted out and chose to keep her hair length. Elise, Sophie, and Ava (as you can see from the grins) were all about the shorter summer length.
We brought back a craft I came up with years ago for the feasts of The Sacred Heart of Jesus and the Immaculate Heart of Mary. I love how they turned out. Kolbe's is especially sweet.
Chris traveled to southern Colorado to help repair and restore the oldest Catholic Church in the state with the Knights of Columbus for a few days at the end of June.
The work was hard, the days were hot, but it looks beautiful.
